Loss of a Loved One

Quote
"I slept in the garage the night [Allie] died, and I broke all the goddam windows with my fist just for the hell of it" (Salinger 39).

Context
Stradlater asks Holden to write a composition for him about an old house. Instead, Holden writes about his brother Allie's old baseball mitt. He tells the reader about his brother and how he had leukemia and passed away a couple of years back.

Analysis
Holden reacted to his brother's death in anger. Allie was intelligent, nice and he never got mad at anyone. When Phoebe told him to name one thing that he liked, Holden responded by saying, Allie. In Holden's opinion, Allie was a thousand times nicer than anyone else that was alive. He reacted so strongly to his brother's death because Allie was one of the only people that he truly cared about.  Allie's death further emphasized Holden's view of how unfair the world is.

Research/Peers' Response
The five stages of grief, introduced in Kübler-Ross' 1969 book On Death and Dying, includes:

• Denial: having trouble realizing that this is really happening
• Anger: questioning the fairness of the loss
• Bargaining: wishing to make a deal to get the person back
• Depression: gets in touch with how sad they are
• Acceptance: having more ability to move on with their life

These stages do not necessarily have to happen in order, and some of them don't have to happen at all. Holden skipped straight to anger and so did some of the people that I asked in the survey. When one person lost their aunt in a car accident, they were shocked and believed it was a lie (denial). They later realized that it was true and started questioning why it had to happen to someone so kind and so loving (anger). They later accepted the fact that their aunt had passed and that everything happens for a reason (acceptance).

If you have just gone through a loss of a significant person in your life, know that you are not alone. Talk to your peers or family about your emotions, but don't keep it bottled up inside. Getting extra rest and maintaining healthy eating habits can help one cope with grief. Another way to cope is writing journal entries. There are no strict rules to this method, but the Center for Journal Therapy suggests limiting the time to 15 minutes or less a day to decrease the likelihood of grief and writing about how you imagine your life will be a year later.

Song
Luther Vandross- Dance with My Father

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J_mzw2MdIFY